Best Advice from a Bartender

"Make your child a big part of your life, not your whole life...............and get a good camera"
                                                                                    Mason the Bartender

This is tough but a must. Give your spouse and yourself a break from time to time.

- Go to the grocery store by yourself
- run an errand (you are still helping out)
- take your kid/s out in the morning and let your spouse sleep in
- go for a walk/stroll with the little one

However you can give eachother a break do it and your relationship with your wife/husband and child will only grow.

The other comment about getting a good carmera is a must. A shock proof camera is a good idea as your kid will definitly get a hold of it at one point or another. Take lots of pictures as dumb as they may be. Going through them months down the road remind you of how small and silly your kids are. They grow up fast and you dont want to miss a minute of it.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

Don't Be Quiet

Don't be quiet while your child is sleeping. This will only lead to any and I mean any sound distubing them and ruining a perfectly good nap. Not only for the baby but for the parents. We need time too!

I recommend unloading the dishwasher, playing music and going about your business as usual.

Getting the little one used to this will avoid them waking up to the sound of a pin drop, a fart (my wife not me), flushing of the toilet,  and the God for saken liquor cabinet squeaking (weekends only).

Plan on getting things done you used to take for granted. Make a phone call with no interuptions, read a book, have a beer (again weekend only) or .....................................take a nap too.

Best Toys?

Forget the expensive, music playing and lite up toys that you think are cool and your child will like!

Find someone that has recently purchased an appliance and grab the box. They make the best forts and will provide hours of play time. I also highly recommend a stick, broom, old shoes and countless flushes of the toilet.


I do not recommend legos (step on one of these barefoot and lookout!), markers or anything that makes noise.

Kenndy sweeping the driveway.

The Stroll

During the summer time there is nothing better than to take in a little window shopping, people watch and take a nice long walk with the Family. These are my Top 3 places to visit that are family friendly, ,have nice restaurants, activities for the kids and are packed with other parents with little ones.

1. Lincoln Park Zoo

   Its free and you can spend the whole day there. We love to take our own lunch and picnic in the park while we people watch. You can stroll through the Zoo, leave and come back. You can also sneak into any of the establishments in the area for a diaper change. It being pretty busy on the weekends, nobody will ever question you.

http://www.lpzoo.org/



2.  Downtown Naperville

  Naperville was voted one of the best towns/cities in America to live a couple years ago.  It is only about a 45 minute drive from Chicago and if you plan it during nap time it goes by real quick. There are the same restaurants as you will find on Rush Street in Chicago minus the 40 somethings looking to pick up the 20 somethings. Aka - Viagra Triangle.
  
   There is a newly constructed "River Walk" that goes for a couple miles right through the heart of the entertainment district. It takes you past the public swimming pool that if about 5 acres big and has its own beach. I t also takes you by a 10 story "bell tower" that is surrounded by a large park to play in or take you own lunch to picnic at. Note- public bathrooms with changing tables!

 
http://www.naperville-carillon.org/



3.  Lake Geneva

A great summer town filled with restaurants, shopping and of course the beach. We visit here about once a month and is just an hour and a half away. Again, plan the drive during nap time. The people are super friendly and you can take a long walk along the lakefront with the stroller. There is a boat house in the center with public bathrooms.

Just across the street is a large playground area and most weekends an art fair or some kind of fair going on with a lot of other young parents with their kids in the same boat as you. Its Wisconsin too, so don't shy away from sneaking into a pub for a quick cocktail and not get too many stares.

http://www.lakegenevawi.com/

The Zipper Effect

Some Advice........

As your young one starts to grasp the concept of "how things work" be prepared for some scars and frustraion. The main enemy my case is the "Automatic, Continuous Clothing Closure" aka the Zipper.

While they may be the "cutest pj's of all times" with prints of the cutest monkey you have ever seen, feet that look like a duck and that little whore Dora the Explorer,  they are only hours away from being conquered and stripped off in the middle of the night like Houdini. An hour or so later the escape artist will start to whine and complain that they, for some reason, are extrmely cold and  in need of some help. 

This is not made by a phone call or email, that you can ignore, but as a whine, cry and then fit of frustration leading to crib shaking and sreams rage.This only happens as you finally fall back asleep after the 2:00 diaper change.

You will wonder......"does my wife hear this and why the Hell is she not getting up?" Note: After a couple Martinis she will finally admit she hears this but does not give a shit.

After throwing the covers off, "accidentally" kicking your spouse to make sure they know who is getting up and making your way to  the room, you find your child naked and freezing their ass off. Asking yourself in a daze "did I forget to clothe my little one?" No of course not! Then you will start to curse Carters, Disney or whoever made these stupid ass pj's.

The other horrible part of them learning how to zip and unzip is that they want to do this to any and all zippers. I still have not lost my baby weight and am a fan of the XL black zip up sweater. Any and every time I hold my precious, she loves to play with my zipper. Only to zip it up as hard as she can it always gets caught  in my overweight  chubby second chin. Resulting in a shriek of displeasure and many cuts and scabs of previous zipper mishaps. DOWN WITH THE ZIPPER!

Mama Said There Will Be Days Like This?

The other morning i was up at 6:00 a.m., like usual, and one of my closet favorite movies was on........One Fine Day. Yes I admitted it.  It stars George Clooney and Michelle Phiffer and is about a crazy day of being a single parent in NYC without a babysitter. 

The song came on by the Shirelles "Mama Said" and I made the comment to my wife that mama should of told us a little more than "there will be days like this" and helped us out with an answer.
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This got me on\ one of my silly rants that my wife just rolls her eyes at. How about "There will be hours, days and months like this"!

Don't worry new parents. For some reason the first six months of your child being in this world you will not remember a thing. It is a complete blur. This is one of those stupid jokes that nature plays on the human race. Because you are so overwhelmed and sleep deprived you will think having another child is a great idea. Good one Creator of Man!

About Me

I am a father of a little girl named Kennedy Taylor. She just turned 19 months old on the 4th. Yes I am now one of those people that celebrate the "monthly birthday". When you become a parent you will too. Its just a reminder how many months you have not got a good night of sleep, stepped on a Cheerio or had a hot meal.

The other shock in my life was moving to the suburbs. Its so quiet and you have to drive EVERYWHERE.  The only reason was to be close to my parents and my in laws. It has been been both very helpful and very stressful. Your parents will now talk to you the same way as they talk to their grandchild.

To be honest I would not change a thing. There is nothing better than walking into her room, at 6:00, and being greeted with the biggest smile and ready to start the day. I cannot share this excitement the morning after a couple cocktails. If you know you have a special occasion to celebrate............get a sitter until 12:00 the next day!

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